If you enjoy the taste of coconuts and prefer your oils to be pressed from fresh, raw ingredients, then my rule of thumb is Unrefined when selecting coconut oils. You'll want to look for "virgin" or "extra-virgin".
On the other hand, if you prefer to not taste the coconut and you do not mind that the coconuts themselves have gone through a chemical process, then Refined may be for you.
There are options and there is no right or wrong - it truly is a personal preference. Obviously, the latter does not have the same health benefits, if any.